Thursday, July 23, 2009

Unsettled

Where there should have been a post on Fig & Walnut Biscotti (which ended up on the floor), I'll write about the wedding instead. This blog is called 'a domestic disturbance' for a reason.

We're not planning on having a wedding registry for a few reasons. For one, we're not having a "real" wedding. Of course it's real, we are pledging our lives to each other, but we're not entertaining our crowd with vows or dancing. We're going to the courthouse with our crew in tow and then taking everyone out for dinner.

This may seem weird to you (our crowd of 30-40 going to the courthouse) but it's quite normal here. In fact, a civil ceremony is mandatory. You get a room all to yourself for signing the marriage certificate and you can invite your nearest and dearest to watch. The typical Argentine wedding is held the next day, with a religious ceremony and blow-out reception. But we felt weird about having a big event, especially since my parents aren't coming, and it would really just be a celebration for Guille's side.

Our US receptions don't really warrant a registry either, being that they're just small get-togethers. But the real reason that we're not registering is because we're not ready to settle down. I've always equated getting married with being settled. But that's not the case at all. I'm not ready to buy a house and fill it with all of the things want yet. In the past 9 years (gulp!) since I graduated high school, I have lived in 8 different cities in 4 different states and 3 countries. Seriously, I can't commit to a place. And I'm happy that I've found someone to spend my chaotic life with.

I can't tell you how relieved I felt when I sold most of the things I owned at a stoop sale before I left Brooklyn. I loved the things that I had, but I was also ready to let go of my juicer, IKEA furniture, survey of art books, etc. It feels good to pack a suitcase and take off. Some day I will be ready, but there's no use in schlepping around a Kitchen Aid mixer until then (especially since they're sold for the equivalent of an average month's salary here).

If I were to have a registry though, it would be filled with this:

Of course I want one.
A proper pie plate.
Fancy pants.
Oh Anthro...how you are my downfall.
Honeymoon airfare.


Note cards with my new name :)

Tea set.

8 comments:

Color Me Green said...

hey - you can still register for a honeymoon through websites like honeyfund. i'm feeling the opposite of you - lately all i want to do is buy nesting things to settle down and have a homey place (probably because our apartment right now feels like a disgusting kennel and another 10 days in it are way too long and we are dying here...) and i can think of a million things i'd register for now if i was getting married! but glad to hear you were happy to have me take that ikea furniture off your hands...even if i didn't get much use out of it. oh well.

Color Me Green said...

ps are you going on any kind of honeymoon??

meag said...

We are planning a honeymoon, but we'd like to go to Europe and we'd like to go in the summer (plus we're saving up now for a Christmas trip to the US)- so we're planning on June of next year. I guess it isn't much of a honeymoon if it's months later?

I do like those registries. I really like how personalized this one is: http://www.thebigday.com/

But it seems like you have to plan it out now (in order to pick airfare, hotels, and restaurants) and I really don't see that happening anytime soon. Maybe we can work out a registry in time for the US reception. It's definitely a cool idea.

Katie said...

When Daniel and I finally tie the knot, it will be a very similar situation to you and Guille. We won't have a big reception with a ton of people. We'll probably just have a dinner out and call it a day. I think your plans sound nice, and you should do what feels right for the two of you.

If you're not ready to settle down, it's probably best not to have a registry filled with things like Kitchen Aid mixers. Though I have to say that you have great taste - I love that list of items you've got going on there.

I have a Kitchen Aid packed away in the U.S. I sold almost all of my possessions before I came to Argentina, but I kept some of my best kitchen stuff. Some day it will make it here!!!

meag said...

One trip at a time, Katie. It'll all make it eventually, along with necessary stashes of peanut butter and marshmallows!

Katie said...

Yes, let's not forget about peanut butter and marshmallows!

By the way, your new name will be Violet Bick? lol Sorry, I couldn't resist.

meag said...

HAHAHAHA! I wish! Violet Bick is an awesome name!

Unknown said...

Meag-
I don't normLly read blogs, let alone post to them. However I can't resist. I too do not want to register. After a week in Villa Maria with our host family, I think John and I have decided NOT to do the whole big wedding thing in the states. I applaud your choice! Thanks also for the tips on surviving Argentina! - sue from CHC